You down with ADD? Yeah you know me!

My friend, S, completely mistook my theory of learned-ADD with "stream of thought." They're completely different. Stream of thought is as follows: I write down something about S and then realize that she will read this blog. After realizing this, I recall that she's a grammar freak and will spot any missing or mis-used commas. So then I go back and fill in the commas that need to be there.

I told S about learned-ADD a long time ago because I had diagnosed myself with it. And I think I might have invented it as well-- I'm not sure if it existed before I thought it up. Anyways, I have learned-ADD. And I didn't have it before I started this job. I was once a sharp guy able to concentrate on any subject for a very long time. However, at my current employ, I'm constantly being called away from my desk to attend to users' tickets/phone calls while I'm trying to concentrate on a project. So my thought process is constantly interrupted throughout the day. This break in concentration is okay once in a while but it happens on a regular basis and it's gone on for over 3 years now. So this constant interruption to my thought processes have led me to develop ADD. Now when I have a few moments to myself -- be it at work or at home -- I keep expecting to be interrupted. I feel like I'm going to get called away any second and that sort of makes it harder for me to focus on what I want to. I wonder if I'm eligible for workers' comp!

Anyways, my stomach still hurts!

Mistakes

I know everyone makes mistakes but I really, really, really hate it when I make a mistake. It eats away at me! JP from work says that I shouldn't let it because it'll just lead me to make more mistakes. But when I think about it over and over, I think about what I can do to not make the same mistake again. I HAVE to fix my mistakes. I'm just that anal.

Dunkin Update!

Alert! I'm in Dunkin Donuts right now with S. We planned to study here after work and actually got a lot done since we've been here for about 1.5 hrs. I just got up from our table to go to the restroom and noticed a sign on the counter saying "Please No Loitering. 30 minute time limit while consuming food. The manager must enforce these rules. Your cooperation is appreciated." And that just goes to show how much they can change their attitude to people hanging out there and studying or reading or whatever. As soon as I noticed this sign, I told S and we had a good laugh. No sooner than we had started to laugh, one of the ladies behind the counter came out and told two guys sitting on the other side of the store that there is a 30 minute limit. S and I stared at each other and got scared that we will get kicked out. Our plan is to leave when her laptop's battery dies. Gulp! I hope we don't get yelled at! Stupid company policy.

Starbucks vs. Dunkin

Last night I admitted to my friend S (I say S because she doesn't want me to use her full name online, weirdo) that I have been known to frequent Starbucks on occasion. Now, if you don't know her, let me fill you in. She's a Dunkin type of girl and thinks Starbucks is pretentious and overpriced. But I think she's a hypocrite because when she told me about the type of coffee house she'd like to open one day, she was describing Starbucks to me. Yes, S, I called you a hypocrite!

The Starbucks vs. Dunkin debate led me to think of Dunkin's business model. If they ever want to expand on it, they should read on. I'm no business genius but here's the deal. Dunkin Donuts focuses their entire business on breakfast and coffee or the ever-so-needed afternoon boost. Yes, they sell donuts but when is the last time you've seen a Dunkin Donuts commercial advertising donuts? Their current slogan is "America runs on Dunkin." I think that 9 out of 10 times, I go to Dunkin for coffee and/or breakfast. And that model has worked fine so far but now they face legitimate competition since McDonald's has come out with premium coffee to go along with their breakfast sandwiches and I've heard that it's pretty good too. It's not only the fact that they face some competition, but they have the capability for a sound expansion on their product right under their nose!

So what is it? I say go with a modified Old Navy/GAP/Banana Republic model. It's really the same company which caters to different audiences/niches. Do the same thing with Dunkin! From my limited knowledge of how Dunkin Donuts' franchising works, I believe that one store with a kitchen supplies satellite stores with donuts. These smaller satellite stores are a perfect fit for the breakfast/afternoon boost crowd. Not many people are going to linger around there. They want their coffee and food and then they're on their merry way. Now what if you approach it differently for a larger store with more room? What if you make it fancier? Put in carpeting and big couches and chairs. Dim the lights. Put on some music and I don't mean a radio station. Put in a wireless hotspot for God's sake! Minor tweaks!

I know that some people believe that when a company tries to go in a new direction which is not in line with the formula that's worked for them for years, it could lead to a big failure, but I believe that this isn't the case with my proposal. They already make flavored coffees and pastries! Add on some brownies and cookies and cakes to the menu and you're on your way to catering to a different crowd. One that will come out at night and hang out there with their laptops and textbooks; going back to the counter for a another latte or snack. I think it's a sure winner.

I want the credit for this if it really happens. Wait, not only the credit but I want COMPENSATION!

Symptoms

Whenever I'm going to get sick my throat burns, nose runs and face hurts (sinuses). I know, those are pretty typical signs but I can pretty much measure the severity of the cold from how much my sinuses hurt. Sometimes it's not so bad but many other times it leads to my entire face hurting. Weird? If there's a doctor reading this, let me know if it's normal for sinuses to cause my eyeball sockets to hurt and my teeth to hurt. Yes, you read right-- teeth. Such was the case this afternoon as I fell asleep watching a show on the 7 Wonders of the Ancient World on the History Channel.

Allow me to introduce myself...

I used to have a blog a very long time ago. It was on my own server and I had actually put up some really good posts like Hairy Infidelity but that server died and I lost it all. I think it's still recoverable but I'm too lazy to get the data from the hard drive. I've wanted to start one up again but I wasn't sure if I wanted to host it on my new server or somewhere else. A few days ago, my manager's wife started a blog on this site (madrantingsofamiddleclassmom) and it made me want to put one up to. I'm a total copycat. I don't normally post on a daily basis; only when I have something to say.

So why did I choose to call it The Untold Legend of Ankit S. Patel? I've decided that when I write my autobiography when I'm old and gray that's what the title of it will be. Also, the cover will have a picture of me dressed in a cowboy outfit and riding a horse out in the Wild West -- possibly chasing cattle, but only with the intention of praying to it after catching it. And not only that but each of the chapters will named after the title of a book that encompasses that stage of my life. So far I have Frankenstein for my high school years and Metamorphosis for the years following Stevens 'til the present day. If anyone tries to steal my idea of naming chapters of your life after books you've read I'll find you and kick your ass!